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The ABCs of Car Travel
Our family took many car trips when we were young. My mother always had a seemingly unending supply of sandwiches and snacks and had the foresight to plan visits which would be fun for us kids, without giving up the agenda she and my father had in mind. There were the inevitable back-seat squabbles, each of us vying for window seats; yet my memories are all very positive. For those of you who expect to travel by car, please read this. It will smooth the road to your destination.
Though all of the parenting books promised us that three-week-old Jordon (he's now 21) would be lulled to sleep by the motion of the car on our first family car trip, we learned early on that he hadn't read these volumes. From the George Washington Bridge almost all the way to our house in Vermont, he expressed his unhappiness in clear and vibrant terms. Almost three years later, Russell joined our family and he, too, had trouble acclimating to long trips in the car. By this time Jordon was asking if we were there yet as we approached 23rd Street (our starting point was 11th Street!).
Patient as we thought we were, by the time we arrived at our destination, we were frazzled, already dreading the trip home. We wound up selling our house and, for a while, we avoided car trips like the plague. Sometimes we had no other choice but to travel by car, so we began listening to advice and tips from friends, relatives and even strangers. Eventually we became creative strategists ourselves. We've survived the stage of one of the boys weeping, "He's looking out my window!" Finally we have learned the knack of turning long journeys into fun and exciting family times — which we're delighted to share with you.
Always talk about the trip with your kids in advance of departure. You'll be surprised at how much even very young kids understand, particularly when put in familiar terms. For example you might tell a toddler that a two-hour drive is like watching two Sesame Street programs. For a longer trip, liken it to being at school for an entire day, in their seats!
Buckle up. It's a given that young children will be secured in car seats; but parents need to set the example by always using seat belts. Bring along a towel to cover up the carseat and/or steering wheel, which can become extremely hot if you park your car on a sunny day.
Comfort is a high priority. We bring along pillows, sometimes blankets, so that the boys can cushion themselves for sleep. Children need to be able to see out of the car windows without difficulty.
Dress intelligently. Tight clothes, fancy garb and the like should be saved for arrival. Inevitably your child will get dirty if you anticipate looking fresh and clean at your destination. Better to find a bathroom a few miles from the end of your journey in which to change. Bring sweatshirts if you plan on turning the air-conditioning on high.
Each family member should pack toys, games and books to help entertain him or herself en route. Guidance from parents is important, but not as important as the children having some control over the selections. We've learned that children as young as 18 months have definite points of view, and even an understanding of which of their favorite items they can play with over and over again. Elicit their assistance.
First-aid kits should be kept in the glove compartment and might include: Bandaids, antibacterial ointment, analgesics (e.g., Tylenol), insect repellent, sunscreen, thermometer, medical prescriptions, antidiarrheal, cotton swabs, gauze pads, adhesive tape and tweezers.
Games and toys should be placed where children have easy access to them without parental assistance. This is to not to discourage interaction, but to avoid frustration for the kids.
Humor goes a long way in changing the mood when cooped up in a car. Turn a complaint into a joke. Acknowledge that being in a car is unpleasant by poking fun at it. We've found our kids giggling through their tears when doing this.
Involve the kids as much as possible, even while en route. Bring along a map and highlighter, marking down your progress as you travel. We carried a "navigator's hat" when the kids were younger and had them participate in the reading of the map, determining where we would be stopping, etc.
Juice-in-a-box, we're convinced, was designed for traveling families. Just be careful when inserting the straw not to squeeze the box! Freeze several the night before taking off; these will keep other items cool for most of your trip. It will also provide refreshing drinks all day long. We've even used them to chill medication!
Know where you'll be staying by 5 p.m. This pre-dinner time, in addition to being when kids are often the crankiest, is when the barrage of questions from the backseat seems never-ending. More importantly, it's also when hotels and motels begin to fill up and No Vacancy signs begin to shine. Having a destination in mind will help you give the kids both a sense of security and something to focus on.
Log expenses, distances covered, sights visited, etc. and create a journal of your trip. Lots of folks like to do this because it involves interaction and creates memories. Kids old enough to add could take on the role of bookkeeper.
Music, music, music. Whether you've got a CD or a cassette player, the options are limitless. There are tunes everyone can sing together or likes to hear. Stories and books on tape are great too. For those times when you can't agree, Walkman is there, but try not to let your teens stay plugged in, out of the family conversation.
Never stay in an unpleasant situation you can avoid. Traffic is a prime example. If you can't get off the highway completely, pull over and jump rope, throw a ball around, have an impromptu picnic. Nothing is worse than being stuck in a car that's not going anywhere.
Organize your belongings in a manner that works for your family, both inside the car and in the trunk. We like to put the kids' stuff on top, since somehow they always seem to need something.
Pack a day bag in the front of the trunk and, depending on the season, include swim suits, towels, rain ponchos, hats, mittens and a change of clothes for everyone. That way you'll be prepared for all emergencies.
Quiet time helps everyone. Don't entertain your kids every minute. Children who learn to amuse themselves develop valuable self-sufficiency skills which will serve them well in later life. Napping is fine too; kids are generally not as enraptured with the scenery as adults are.
Relax and retreat to a vacation state of mind. The phones aren't ringing; there are fewer time limitations; there's time to listen and hear what your kids have to say. Savor these moments; they disappear all too quickly.
Stop back seat bickering by consulting your kids in advance about how they think car disputes should be solved. Write down their solutions and when the first complaint rings out, whip out the pad with their responses and read their words back to them. This ploy really works!
Take along: A surprise game or toy; snack food that is not too salty or too sticky (fruit is a good choice); a shade to block the rays; an old blanket; extra pacifiers; flashlight and lots of extra batteries.
Underplan. Don't include too many must-dos or must-sees. Go with the flow.
Vary the types of roads you take, some highway, some backcountry roads. Change seats from time to time if your kids get real antsy. Play different kinds of music. Make an impromptu stop.
Wake any sleepers about 10 minutes before you plan to stop so they can re-enter the world with a minimum of grogginess (and get their shoes on).
X-pect the unexpected. Something unforeseen is sure to crop up — a too-good-to-pass-up street fair, a flat tire, a detour. Here's another occasion when a sense of humor and common sense can be tapped to advantage.
Young toddlers with excessive energy are the hardest to satisfy. Early communication, involvement and lots and lots of stops where they can release energy will work wonders.
Zippered or plastic bags are always handy to take along. Use them for garbage, special treats, wet towelettes, etc. They are also great repositories for the inevitable goodies children collect during your trip!
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